CBT thinking error–Tunnel Vision-seeing only the subset of information that confirms your point of view.
Have you ever met a new love and other people tell you to be careful, maybe the person was violent with an ex, breaks the law, etc. The new love may admit to the violence with an ex but says it was the other person’s fault. He/she declares that with you it will be different. You are the only person who understands him/her. Even when you get hit the first time, you tell yourself it was your fault, he/she really didn’t mean it. Your love comes back and apologizes. He/she said the/she loves me. He brought flowers or jewelry. You just know if you love him/her just right, he/she will change. You believe the lie that you are different from the others. At the end of the relationship you bring up the loving things he/she said, and the love says “you believed that s**t?
We hang on to the few days that were good hoping they increase when in fact they decrease.
If you are in such a situation, please contact a mental health professional to help you build up your strength to get out. You are a valuable child of God and deserve to be treated with respect.
If you are in the DFW, you can schedule with met at http://www.ditchetheliecounseling.com